Thursday, June 22, 2006

CD Review: The Head Cat, Fool's Paradise

CONTENT WARNING: The Author freely admits to despising this album, if you are looking for a nice candy coated review, please leave now.

The Head Cat? or should it be The Beheaded Cat? I am at a loss, is this album for real? Right from the opening, it sounds like karaoke from a biker's bar! Bad songs sung by bad voices, with echo and reverb in the recording, overall a stellar performance in exactly how not to make an album. And this was actually sent out for review? What were they thinking; I did not even receive a good supply of malt liquor with it to make it go down smoother! "Fool's Paradise", the title and opening track is absolutely the equivalent of finger nails on a chalk board; I have never seen perfectly good plastic so blatantly wasted.

This thing was billed as a "Rock-a-billy" side project from Motorhead's Lemmy, and The Stray Cats' Slim Jim Phantom. I was actually intrigued by the idea as I read about it, I loved both of those bands as a kid, and the very thought of attempting this seemed kind of cool. Holy Cat Claws Batman, was I wrong!!

Neil Young can get away with singing out of tune because, well hey, he's Neil Young! I have absolutely no idea what in the hell was going through Lemmy's mind when he published this CD, other than it would make one hell of a prank gift for those who have everything and appreciate nothing. If you have read my reviews here before, I can throw a soft jab or two at something I don't like, but this is the first on record where I can't seem to dig up a single nicety about this CD.

I kept looking over my shoulder as I listened to this thing, wondering where the hidden cameras were, this can't be real! Just when the worst song ends, up starts a new level of sounds that emulate from a Siamese cat in heat with only dogs surrounding her, un believable, I truly have heard it all! Lemmy Kilmister created Motorhead, unbelievable head banging Heavy Metal at its best, what in the name of Ozzy was he thinking when he decided to do this? Seriously, this attempt is the parallel experience of envisioning the entire Osbourne clan sing Barney songs at a gay bar in San Francisco, it just don't work.

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